The Final Fantasy

I am about to turn 18. Not a big deal really. Yeah, I can offically do... what really? I can buy/smoke cigarettes, drive a car with a full license, and have sex with other 18+'s. Sounds great. You know that phrase your parents always use against you? "Why don't you just grow up! You are almost an adult now!" Well, this meaning is about to change for the worst.

Is there a way to escape this onslaught of "growing up"? I have searched a long time for the answer. Peter Pan had the right idea until he got bored. I'm not bored yet. There are so many goals I still want to achieve. But I know that some are just not going to be possibe. That hidious phrase will keep coming to attack me. What am I going to do?

I don't have to worry about "growing up" like Peter Pan was. He could fly anyway. What more could he want? (Selfish jerk) My friends are all like "I want that new game for my birthday!" "That sounds like an awesome new system!" "Is there really something that awesome?" I can't have what I want. The last time I asked for something for my birthday I got a chair that was on sale. Sorry to fill you in parents, but NEVER buy a chair for a kid unless A. They asked for it or B. You want to teach them a lesson: That life isn't fair, That no one gets what they want, That no matter how much you crave something you won't get it unless you earn it yourself. That is a hard lesson at the age of 13 where getting a job is out of the question and finding a dollar is like finding five.

I don't think I have every been given something on my birthday that I can really say I remember being all super excited about. The things I really looked at were called "Inappropriate for your age" or "Your too old to still be doing that". Well here we are, five years later and I am still hoping... wishing...

So I did the only sensible thing. You see, after I got a job I became a great saver. Well not GREAT, but I usually have a nice twenty or fifty lying around waiting for the right moment. Well when it comes around my birthday time, I decided I would buy myself something. Nothing super expensive (ha, yea right) but something I saw and said "Hey, I think thats cool." I started doing it for Christmas too. THat same year infact. Now it is my birthday once again around the corner and I pulled out that big bill and thought how to use it to please my inner ID.

Too bad I got a super ego too. I can do a lot more with that bill now I'm an "adult" than I could when I was "growing up".

So now I sit impatiently at my computer. Watching the clock tick down to the end of my childhood. And I realized something. How EMO this piece is. And thats when the tears began to form for the first time in five years.